Was Yesterday … Friendship? Love? Both?

Was it friendship? Was it love? Was it both? Friendship is love.

Yesterday was a wild, wonderful day! Full, busy and fun!

Here is the best thing about yesterday, which, obviously I saved for last in my intro. It was a happy day! I went to a small hamlet nearby and enjoyed a two and a half hour brunch with one of my best friends, Marie. That is not her real name but she is oh so real and oh so good. We are friends, best friends. We have discovered that we think alike. Our abusive families of origen, (which are only mentioned when personal resilience is present), are very similar. Unfortunately in some family abuse, one child is targeted. In my family I was the whipping boy, the target. My parents mentored my siblings to share in the abuse so that my life was only as good worthless as they deemed fit. It is a worse life existence for little girls because somebody, somewhere, at some time will prey on their vulnerability and sexual abuse may occur. Far too often these poor angels end up tortured and/or dead.

So for tortured blessed angels like Marie and I, when we discover that we are abuse survivor doppelgängers of a sort, it presents the chance that a faith in each other, a friendship may be possible. Faith is a foundation of friendship. For her and I, not only is this friendship possible, it is a reality. We have been acquainted for the past 6 years through our mutual commitment to a long term recovery program. I have been in recovery since early 2003. It is only this year  that I felt I was able to become a good friend to this fellow survivor.

My experience  in ‘the rooms’ (since June ’05) has shown me that people enter as victims. But if they work hard at their recovery, they can cease being victims and start enjoying their lives as survivors.

Marie has worked hard at her recovery as I have. When she spoke in the group I realized how sharp her mind was, is. Now we are recent friends and very recently we are best friends. As with all relationships, whether it be friendship or more, there are boundaries. One obvious boundary is that our agendas have different goals. In spite of that, what a wonderful friendship it is.

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